Here are just a few from the abundant pages of Cheap Poems. None of this is weighty or serious. This first one is called "If I Were a Playful Lord."

If I were a playful lord
I'd throw away my gun and sword
And play upon the harpsichord
For lovely ladies who were bored,
Then when the light partitas soared
And contrapuntal canons roared
Each lady would be quite restored
And clap and cry, "Be my adored
And you shall share my bed and board
And play upon my harpsichord!"

and here's another called Rainy Days:

Yesterday it rained some more
Just as it did the day before,
And now it's rained all day today
And kept the kids indoors to play
And made them cross, and this has led
To tears and spankings and to bed.
Oh, it will bring us all great sorrow
If it rains again tomorrow.

There's lots of this kind of nonsense by the underpaid editors at Spring Harbor Press.

Send us the check, we'll send you the book. That's $4.00 for the little book, plus $1.00 for postage and handling. If you order more books you pay only $2.00 for postage and handling, no matter how many you order. And, of course, each book comes with an envelope. That's the charge for everyone except residents of New York. who have to add the appropriate sales tax, too.

Spring Harbor Press
P.O. Box 346
Delmar, New York 12054.